Out with the old and In with the new

Happy New Year to everyone!! It was a different holiday season for me to say the least. I have been so busy with everything that I did not send out Christmas cards this year. It is not that I forgot. I just made the conscious decision not to do it. I have too much on my plate at this given time (thus the lack in blogs also) and cut it out.




I think that this is the first time I have not sent out cards since 1990….at least. Longer if you count doing my mom’s cards before I moved out. (In case some of you are wondering why you haven’t got a card from my mom since 1990; I moved out.)

So I thought I would post this to let those of you that might be concerned…I’m not dead. Just extremely busy. This goes also if I have missed your birthday in the last several months. Or you child’s birthday. Ditto.

I also wanted to say thank you to all my friends and family that I received a card from this year. I enjoyed them all. Loved them. Smiled. Laughed. Cried at a few. Felt warm and fuzzy.

But you are not getting one from me. I am shooting for maybe Easter cards. Or maybe July. Or next Christmas. (Ask Savanah how that baby book is coming along.) Or this could just be one of the final morphs into my mother. You may never get one again until Savanah starts doing them for me.

Just sayin’.

Have a great 2013 and I hope you had a very Merry Christmas filled with love and family!!!

…and to those that it applies: Happy Birthday!


Bump in the Road

As most of you have probably heard, I am moving to Texas.


Jay and Isaac left on Thursday to head to Texas. They only made it about and hour and a half away and





So then they




And now they are in Texas.

Wish us luck.

Still Alive or Hello Texas or Moving On

or should I say Staying Alive.

Well I am still here. It has been a long crazy time since I posted. To quote The Dead, ” What a long strange trip it has been.”

You can never predict what life will throw at you. All you can do is catch, duck, or run.

That said, I am currently packing the house in a very haphazard manner. Why am I not used to moving yet? I have been doing it my whole life. It never gets easier. I think that it should. How long till that kicks in?

I have said it before and I will say it again….It sucks having people you love all over this country…and out of it for that matter. You will always miss someone. There is no one place that I can call home. Home materially is a temporary illusion. Home truthfully is a state of mind. Which basically shoots all the Christmas songs I love right in the ass.

Which brings me to the lyrics of a song I do also love. Hello Texas, Sure is good to see you again! Hello Texas, Sure is good to see me a friend!

Guess I am Texas bound. Something I never expected to hear myself say. But here we go.

Positives of living in Texas:

Warmer weather ( I can wear less clothing, which means I will have to lose the insulation I have built up against the cold mountain weather.)

Longer Growing Season (Can you say tomatoes?)

Closer to my Granny

Same distance from my Mom

Closer to Texas Family ( I plan on having a Gone With The Wind Movie Night in the upcoming future.)

Closer to Beth

No cumbersome mountains to block my view of the horizon (sorry, slipped into a little bit of sarcasm right there. That dang sarcasm font never works right.)

Warm clear creeks (when there is water anyway) and you can sit on the bottom and watch the fish like you are in your own personal aquarium. I always loved that. I have spent countless hours at the bottom of the Nueces River.

A higher concentration of Honkey Tonks (That’s you and me, Granny. Get ready! I’m packing my dancing boots. Three pair actually.)


WARNING to all Texas Family

Everytime I move to a new location they have record-breaking weather in that area. Example for the last 20 some odd years:

Missouri 1993- record-breaking rain. 100 year flood. high water as far as the eye can see. St. Louis arch is literally under water because the Mississippi river is so far out of its banks.

Arizona 2005- record-breaking rain in the spring. The sandstone hills were as green as I have ever seen them. They looked like the pictures of Hawaii they were so green. Then with record-breaking rain comes record-breaking vegetation growth which then dries under the Arizona sun and becomes the record-breaking fire season.

NorCal 2010/2011 – Heavy snowfall very late in the season and early in the next. It snowed in August and then through until the end of June. Summer lasted exactly two months.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you. I am not to be held responsible for any acts of mother nature.





Quotes of the Day

Here are some quotes from my day. I’ll let you guess who they belong to (multiple choice).


1-“Momma, tell the story about my fart again.”

2-“Tonight we are having Pigs in a Blanket and Tater Tots. Totally unhealthy dinner.” ~Me

                The reply “Awesome!  That means I’ll get to poo twice tomorrow!”

3-“I know! We could have a giant shredding contest and set the timer and see who could shred the most, the fastest!”

4-“Can I pee in your bathroom?”

5-“Momma, watch what is my favorite thing that I like to do with my towel!” (This would be the wet bath towel that was just used for a shower then to put on a fairly impressive matador type performance.)

6-“Bark. Bark. Bark. Woof. Bark. never-ending BARK”

7-“Can I use your bathroom? I have to poop.”

8-“Great, it is like a live puppet show.” (This was in response to the two dogs standing on the outdoor furniture at dinner time so they can pop up and down looking into the window at us at the table and mass giggling ensued.)


A. Dad   B. Momma  C.Isaac   D. Matthew   E. Savanah   F. Spencer  G.Dinah & Nova (AKA Canine Puppets)

I’ll give you a hint; the last one (#8) was me (Momma).

The Arrival

We were all glad to be out of the truck and walk around.

Unloading the tail end of the Uhaul that evening just to get suitcases, essentials and various small items out of the way; a rouge kitchen chair kamikaze’d out and clobbered two of the kids on top of the heads. Isaac and Savanah were both teary eyed with lumped noggins.

The trip was hard on Spencer. Being cooped up in the truck for two days is hard on arthritic old hips. He hobbled around for a good week and I am afraid he has not quite fully recovered yet(guilt). He favors one hind leg all the time. He takes nose dives off the stairs of the porch because inside he is still a young dog and he could clear them in one leap. It breaks my heart.

He fell in the koi pond right off the bat.

I heard one of the kids yell,”Spencer fell in the pond!”

I thought, ” Oh brother.” As I walked out to take a look.

When I cleared the porch, I could not see him in the water and the water was still and calm. I panicked then thinking he was under and rushed the rest of the way over to find him cowering in the cattails clinging to a rock on the side with his front paws. He had given up trying. The sides are so steep he could not climb out. And I could not pull him out…so I went in after him. I got behind him and shoved up on his huge rump while Matthew pulled from the front end(thank goodness his harness was still on from the trip or we would have never gotten him out. You would have seen us on some show like Amazing Animal Rescues). Together we managed to heave his big dumb brown butt out of the water. I was wet up to my pants pockets. He has since mastered the edge of the pond. Thank goodness I really don’t want to go in again any time soon. But unfortunately now we think we have a leak in the liner; big brown dogs have big brown toenails.

I always wondered how I got the one Labrador Retriever on the planet that did not like water and was for the most part inept around it. I know for a fact that he did not jump in intentionally. He would never swim of his own accord. He fell in leaning over to get a drink. Either he couldn’t hold himself up when he leaned over too far on his old crippling legs or a rock gave way under him. He is a couch dog. Not a water dog. True blue.

Dinah could care less where we are and who is with her. As long as she has her bed, her goat and someone feeds her once a day. She is happy…in a Dinah sort of way, but she would never let us know that.

The Moving Road Trip: Day Two


The next day we took it a little easier. We stopped in Manteca and cruised the BassPro. Was good to walk for a bit and the boys had lots of fun. They had never been to a BassPro before.

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

I took all three of the children for the final 100 miles. Which I have to say was the most tiring 100 miles of the trip. I was tired period and the children were tired of being in the vehicle.

One had ants in his pants (Lean Left. Lean Right. Feet Up. Feet Down. Feet Under. Feet Out. Chair Back. Chair Forward.Chair Up. Chair Down.) While one pretended to be a puppy from Mt. Shasta on. And the smallest one reenacted the entire musical score from the Wizard of Oz.

But we all made it. No catastrophes.

The Moving Road Trip: Day One

Overall it was a great road trip. We only had one princess tantrum(which was right out of the gate so got it over with and nipped it in the bud) and the whole trip was crowned with the worst case of canine flatulence in the history of the world. The picture on the right shows Jay doing everything he can possibly come up with in order to gain some relief without exiting the vehicle at 65 miles per hour.We got on the road earlier than anticipated. Great start. Made good time. Landed for the night in Fresno(well over half the journey).  

The kids rotated turns riding in the Uhaul, as did the drivers. Arriving in Fresno; it was the boys and I in my truck and Jay with Pea in the Uhaul. I pulled into the motel parking lot and watched the Uhaul roll in. I walked to greet it and was looking up at the driver’s door as it swung open. I wish I had a camera at that very moment. The look on Jays face was indescribable. 

At first I thought something was seriously wrong. I had one of those mother panic moments when my heart skipped a beat with the anticipation of what had happened. Then a nanosecond later I burst into laughter as I realized that the look was complete listening exhaustion. 

They say a picture is worth a thousand words. In this case it was an estimated 400 billion. That averages out to 1,142,857,143(one billion one hundred forty-two million eight hundred fifty-seven thousand one hundred forty-two) per mile that Jay and Pea were in the Uhaul together that afternoon. 

He declared, “She has not drawn a breath for 350 miles! OH MY GOD!” 

Now I know what my face looks like after a long day of Savanah conversation/questioning. 

We ordered a pizza, walked the dogs, swam the kids and collapsed in the room for the night.

Wild Kingdom

Observe the elusive feral box pile as it grazes.

The cardboard box pile tends to be migratory. Occasionally it will find suitable habitat and stay with in the confines of a certain territory. Especially if the terrain hosts several nonfunctioning vehicles and an old refrigerator. We can not explain at this time why the box pile will choose to stay in  the vicinity but we believe that the presence of broken down vehicles and refrigerator offer the box pile a sence of security of sorts.

We were lucky enough to capture a snap shot of this fine specimen before it moved onto greener pastures. 

If you happen across a box pile as large as this one in the wild – do not make any sudden moves as they can become aggressive when threatened. Notice how this one has frozen in place once it spotted our camera crew in the hopes that it will blend into the surroundings.

I found the computer under a pile of rubble.

Well the box pile is dwindling. While the empty box pile in the yard is growing. My hands are dry and sore from the vampiric cardboard sucking every last bit of moisture and oil from my flesh (not that I had much to spare to begin with).

I can actually sit at my desk and my computer to type this blog. True, I did have to excavate the mouse from under a pile of miscellaneous but I’m not complaining. I am sitting in a room with furniture and only three, count them three, boxes present. There are no suitcases in the bedroom any longer and you can see off the front porch if you pick the right locale. Things are moving along. Except me. I’m afraid I moved rather slowly today. Wearing down. But I see a stopping place where I can putt along on the remainder at a slower pace (though I still want everything done instantaneously).

I have a notepad of chicken scratching full of the events of the move trip and first couple of days. I wanted to get my thoughts on paper before they were gone and more importantly the humorous events lapsed from my mind. I hope that once I have time to pound them out on the keyboard they are still fresh enough to enthuse me.

Time will tell.

Until then, onward ho!

The Next Phase

My real estate property management career has come to a close….rather sedatley.  Not much more than a few beers, game of darts and some super good super bad for you fried bar food to usher it out. This past Monday was my last day at the West Valley office and this up coming Monday represents my official final day as the East Valley Property Manager. My duties will pretty much end tomorrow as I hand all the files, documents and info off to my replacement at high noon in the Wendy’s parking lot half way between her house and mine.

This past Monday(which already seems a long time ago) was strange. Surreal even. I came home after work and bar send-off about 10PM and found myself extremely melancholy. A reaction that I was totally unprepared for. I had been counting down and anticipating this day for so long. I am not sure what I expected but being as depressed as I was, was not it.

I am not sure if it was simply the let down of something that you look forward to for so long (like the day after Christmas).  Maybe it is because I was shown the same enthusiasm that was exerted for any other event surrounding my employment. Or the fact that I am leaving behind a very large phase of my life that I worked very hard at, and in some sick masochistic way did find rewarding as far as careers go, got great satisfaction from it and took pride in.

Of course I take pride in any task I decide to conquer. That is just how I am. That is the hard wiring. Something that many of my coworkers and even a boss or two don’t seem to understand. I just can’t seem to do a shit job-no matter how hard I try. Even after the higher-ups piss me off and I say that I don’t give a crap anymore-I still can’t bring myself to do a bad job.

So now I am at home sort of wandering around without direction, looking at all the stuff I need to accomplish over the next two weeks. I feel like I am suffering from shell shock. Career fallout. I don’t really know how else to describe it. It is picking up though. Today was more productive than the day before(even with a 5-year-old with the stomach flu) and the day before that and so on…… Cause Tuesday really sucked.

If I had a little more experience at this unemployment business I would be four days into a solid nap on the couch by now, getting up only to pee, eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich while hovering over the kitchen sink, and smoke. But I guess I just didn’t pay enough attention to my ex husband’s technique with how to cope. Besides I don’t have a couch so I’m pretty much screwed there. As my sister would say, “I could take to my bed.” But ahck, that’s just not my style.

So setting a new course for productivity tomorrow. 5-year-old throw-up sessions allowing. And onward ho!!! We are initiating the next phase.

« Older entries